I have thought for years that my feminist streak has died down if not completely vanished. I have thought for years that the “feminist bitch” (my nickname in college) that was me 10 years ago has transformed herself into this beautiful, grown up human being that now is open to diversity, and open to people just being richly different and enjoying it, a being that is able to forgive even the most hurtful of crimes, and tries to look for the good in the world!
Well, that’s all true, until some moron pisses me off and lies to me. Not once, not twice, not three times, and not about just one thing… Lies about life, and me, and him, and love and honesty itself. For YEARS! Yes, I do feel stupid, for not seeing it sooner, but of course it’s so much easier to blame the culprit. And hate him for, once again, insulting my intelligence! Now, please note that I said “I hate him”, not “them”, therefore I try (at least) not to generalize. Try to!
So, here I am back in my “feminist” corner, telling myself once again that the bottom line of life is “men are pigs” (or at least the ONE that crossed my path). For a couple of days I moped in that corner; cried, and yelled, and kicked, and screamed over nothing, of course, but spilt milk. And I know this is cheesy, but I also believe these days those people who say “women can fake orgasms, but men fake whole relationships”; I believe them, because I have seen it. At least one man can. Trust me!
After the whining was over and the tear-well has dried out, of course I did what any respectable Aries would do: stood up, brushed off, and moved right on. No, life is too short to be down for too long, especially for people who are not men enough to be themselves. Especially for those! I would not give the satisfaction!
I know, his defense would be (not that I asked or care to do it): “I was being nice. I didn’t want to rock the boat. I didn’t want to have a fight, a confrontation”. Well, I got news for you, Mr. Man: thank you very much for asking, or for your "thoughtfulness", but I don’t need a “nice man”; what I need is an “honest man”. Even if you’re an ass, wear it on your sleeve, like, well, …“a man”. Why do you want to go down into eternity as a liar, is beyond me?! Also, why waste years of your life trying to cover up?! That again is mind-boggling to me! Is your life really that cheap?!
You know, rudeness is not a crime, but lying is. Take a hint! And respect yourself enough not to waste your time, and others’ with a lie. If nothing else, it will make you lose all the respect you want from people. So, is that really worth it?!
My mom used to say: “remember that lies have small feet; they never walk too far” – so, sooner or later you’ll be busted, and I would have no interest in even chatting with you about the weather. After all, you’ll even try to convince me it’s snowing in the Sahara Desert, right?! Who knows?! Not me, ‘cause I am going to let you waste someone else’s years, from now on!
Life is precious and it’s the only guarantee we have. I will make a definite commitment not to waste it on people that don’t deserve it. The slightest gut feeling I’ll get that will warn me against someone, I might not give them the benefit of a doubt like I have tried to. I have tried for years to be more forgiving, but I guess it’s just not who I am. And some people are just not worth it.