Baseball Games

Disclaimer: this is not for some shy ears, maybe ...

You gotta understand I am not from around these parts. Around the parts I am from they don’t have baseball. So, I am trying to be a “good American”, now that at least on paper I am one, although not sure how “good”, and learn this game which is bragging to be “America’s pastime”, or “America’s sport”.
For the life of me, I know not why they say that about baseball, either! I’ve always thought cheerleading would be it: enjoyed, it seems, equally by men and women, for different reasons, and although I have not done the research, I can swear it’s an American “genuine” invention, but anyways, let’s not digress!
So, recently, I have been trying to go to real life baseball games, watch them on TV, I have even considered buying a book on baseball, to learn it, as a true American. I am not sure I am getting the game totally, yet, but I enjoy seeing it live!
How can you not, though, pray tell?! What’s there in a stadium that you would hate?! Nothing!! The beer, the food, the people watching, the cheers, the music, and oh, yeah, the game, too make for such an entertaining environment, quite hard to beat elsewhere!
I will keep you posted on my progress understanding the game, if interested, but for right now, I noted some of the conversations my friends and I can carry on at a game. Just made me smile re-reading my old notes, and just thought I’d share. These are real life ones, of which the “undersigned” has been part. And one of my wonderful friends is the accomplice:

“Oh, I like my wiener loaded!”

“Can you hold my nuts so I can take care of my wiener?”

“Ma’am, I didn’t want the small one! I need the foot long, please! Thanks.”

“Where can I put my nuts?”
“Just sit them in my lap.”
“Don’t let them get too warm now!”

“Do you want a bite (of a pretzel)?”
“No, thanks, I don’t like the thick ones. I like the skinny, small ones.”
“Really??????”- my friend says with bulging eyes, in disbelief…

Oh, the memories …