Thursday, May 28, 2009

Unwanted Party

Note: major grossness alert

If it's true what they say in some cultures (Romanian included) that in the next life you'll get to consume (as in "eat") what you kill during the current life span, then I will be probably "feasting" on lots of mosquitoes, spiders, a handful of ants, and starting today, on slugs, as well.

This year, instead of hydrangeas and petunias, I decided to plant the hardiest, easiest to take care of flowers there are on my front porch: pansies. I figured, they're budget friendly, and purple, and nothing can kill them. Well, I didn't know slugs love them for their breakfast, and lunch, AND dinner!

So, in a matter of weeks, my two oversized planters of pansies, have been reduced to nothing, because the blooms have disappeared under my own eyes, just devoured by the little yucky creatures!

I knew from my mom that salt makes them melt. Literally. But I didn't want to put salt on the flowers, for fear that might kill them. So, I asked around and a friend of mine advised to put a tray full of beer around the pots, they'll go to the beer tray and drown. Sounds easy enough, doesn't it?!

And it's true: they surely go towards the beer. The entire neighborhood of slugs found out about the beer tray and apparently wanted to join the party! So, when I came home today, I find a whole colony, a whole carpet of slugs, if you will, strolling towards the beer trays! Oh, my God! I have not seen that many slugs in my whole life. There must have been about 50 drowned and about another 50 around the trays, on their way over to the ... drowning.

So, salt was next! And of course, the scientist mom has always been, she was right: they melt like nothing. So, now, I have two trays full of beer and dead slugs and one porch covered with salty dead piles of slugs as well.

The sight is frightful (not to mention disgusting as all) and I think I will have nightmares all night of being eaten alive by giant slugs. Or eating them. In my next life. Either way, it's making my skin crawl!

I tell you, God had really some awesome creative moments when He created Life on Earth as we know it, but He was really having a bad day when He created slugs!

I will definitely not look at beer the same way ever again. That's for darn sure! And next time: I'll get petunias! I can at least spray for bugs on those!


Charlie said...

Here's a little trick for you. You don't put the salt on the flowers. You put the salt around the flowers. No slug will come near them. Better yet, salt all the way around your little yard, along the fence. I'm sure you've killed all the ones that lived in your yard. Now the trick is to keep any more from appearing. Salt around the yard will do the trick.

TonyaB122 said...

What, no pictures?

A.W. said...

Haha. I debated LONG and HARD about the pictures. And I figured I'd save the world from massive hurling, so I refrained myself. It was one of the grossest sights I have seen. Ever. ;-)
I didn't even take one for me: I figured I would not need to remember THIS! I know: it's against my very nature, but ... even I have a limit.

TonyaB122 said...

In the last year I have seen a raw sheep head with bulging eyes, various animal bones picked until they shine, and whole fish with collapsed eyes, but SLUGS are where you draw the line? Seriously? And to think, you lured me in with a "grossness" warning...