Friday, August 21, 2009

A Rant

My mantra this week: from The Yoga Journal - a sign above the change jar in a coffee shop reads: “Fear change? Leave it here!”.

Oversleeping. Every day and then some. Wanting to call in sick, but no good reason to. Can you call in sick to claim laziness? I always thought that’s a disease!

Too much work. No. An inhumane amount of work. The work for four done by one. Doesn’t seem fair, does it?! No kudos. Just more work. And complaints that perfect-ness was not achieved. No real need for kudos. Just need for less work. Life is never fair when it comes to what we think we deserve, is it?!

Sick of office dramas. Why do adults behave like 4 year olds whose toys have been misplaced? Do we really have time in our adult lives to worry about whose bean count is higher?! Really??

Long lost friends coming back into the picture. Sometimes happily. Sometimes just to reaffirm the disappointment. Life’s cruel, I tell ya. Life’s cruel in telling you you were right when you made the toughest choice.

News about Patrick: first good, more progress; then not so good: the child discovers he can move, and therefore fall, too, so he’s a walking hazard! Tears. Pain. Worry. How will he do in daycare? More fear … And worry … How did nay of us made it to adulthood, I wonder?!

Days too hot and days too long when you can’t exercise because of no stamina whatsoever. I need a new life! Some days more than others!

Rediscovery of “the mat”. So refreshing. Returning back to my oasis and finding all my muscles and my ham strings again! Oh, how they scream!!!

A birth. A new life. And then sickness. Sadness and more. Then, a death of an acquaintance’s family member. More work and sadness. Discovering how insensitive management can be in the face of tragedy. Too bad that they don’t factor in human emotions in the “bottom line” which we’re all (allegedly) striving for. Life goes on. It stops somewhere, and it starts in another spot … always moving. Not asking us for approval …

Vacation plans! How sweet!

Home cooked meals! Discovery of Romano cheese – salty and creamy all at the same time! Garlic! Yum!

Lunch with remote friends, and knowing that one cannot be forgotten. Such a relief to know that there are people who can still make a difference. And more importantly, that there are people who still bother enough to recognize that. The human factor has not died in the world, after all! It might be meager, but not extinct.

Above and beyond all … love. Mutual, deep, passionate and caring, like I have never, ever dreamed of. I have always thought I wanted to live a romance that movies and books have not written about yet … And now, it feels like I am there. Happiness. Joy. And distance. But going to bed with a prayer that it’ll be there tomorrow. And a thank you that it is here today.

Finished books. About passion, death and life. New books. On humor and lighter hearts. A good mix of the ever consistently delivering “written word”.

Being tired, and being sleepy 24/7. Hungry and fed. Loved and cold. And hot outside. Missing people I love, and sharing the proximity and lives of those who are near. All – such a gift! Happy and frustrated. Generous and judgy.

In other words: just a regular week…

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